Fear

So today I had a trip to the dentist, yes the scary dreaded dentist. About 3 weeks ago I plucked up the courage to get seen to as it was my friends Hen weekend and my tooth was killing me and I didn't want it to spoil the fun. Imagine the thoughts of not drinking forced me to confront one of my biggest fears. As a child I had a horrendous time in which I was consistantly in the dentists getting teeth pulled left right and centre due to overcrowding. So much so that it scared me for life. 

So I decided to write a little segment on my experiences over the next few months on how I am going to conquer my fear.

As I said a few weeks ago one of my back teeth starting getting really sore which lead to the nerve in the tooth being very exposed whenever I ate or drank anything a pain would shoot right up the side of my face. It was killing me and I knew I had to make an appointment because (a) I didn't want to get an abscess and (b) I didn't want it running my weekend away... Trust an Irish person to try conquer their fear because it might affect their social lfe

So off I went and made the appointment like I said. Now for me to even make an appointment was a big deal, it took me 20mins looking at my phone to even get the courage to dial. Straight after booking in I felt sick and wanted to cancel. But I convinced myself it was ages away and I would probably not even go. Soon enough the appointment came round and silly me booked it for 12 in the day during work (I said I'd pop over on my lunch) This meant that I could not concentrate all morning and I physically had myself sick with worry. Now I'm not sure if by now you think that I am just exaggerating but this will tell you how bad I am. I rang that morning to cancel because I thought I wouldn't have enough time during lunch to go over (it's a 5 min walk away from work) an excuse obviously and the dentist said look just come in for a chat. When I actually got to reception and the nice lady asked me my name I started crying..... Yes a grown woman crying!!! I did feel silly but I couldn't help it. She didn't even bring me into the waiting room as I was sure she thought I would probably run away (I probably would have )

Off I went in to the dental surgery and sat on the chair again full of nerves and watery eyes. The man was just lovely and understanding and really made me feel at ease. Check up complete and in need of a lot of work done but knowing how much it took me to make an appointment he didn't want to do any work on me that day. So I scheduled in for 2 weeks later which was yesterday. Again the thoughts of  yesterday had me losing sleep, that anxious pit in your stomach like you are a little child in trouble with your parents. I was a little cleverer this time round and I made the appointment early so I didn't spend the whole day thinking about it. Again I thought about cancelling and even when I drove into town that morning I drove round in circles convincing myself there was no parking and maybe I shouldn't go in. In I went in the end and was sent off to the waiting room, I literally paced the floor back and forth all the while thinking that I was going to get sick. In to the waiting room came another dentist saying I would have him today as the other dentist was off...alarm bells ringing!! But your not my dentist. He asked would I like to reschedule and I said YES. I couldnt have ran quicker out the door. See the reason I wanted the other dentist is because he has the Gas, not sure of the technical name of it but it calms your nerves and I knew it would be the only thing to help me get through this. See I not bad with pain as I have had 2 kids it's more phycological with me

Which brings me to today, I had an appointment for 2:30pm, I couldn't get an early one this time. Third time lucky off I went, waited 15 mins in the waiting room and had been just about to get up and leave when he called me in.

 Step 1 Sat on the chair, which may not seem like a big deal but years ago I did that and got up to leave my fear had been so bad. 

Step 2 Calmed the nerves with the gas 

Step 3 Needle, almost there

Step 4 Procedure

I felt pretty damn proud of myself afterwards 

Now I have to go back and get more done but I'm on the right track to conquering my fear. It will take a while but I will get there. My advice for anybody in the same situation as myself is to get a dentist you trust it makes all the difference

I'll keep you posted on my progress xx